The Pink Elephant in the Room

Don't worry, he's not hurt! He just decided he'd like to be artwork, in the car!

This is my boy. My second son, we lovingly call Salad. If you look the expression "all boy" up in the urban dictionary, I'm pretty sure you'd find his picture. He loves to run, and dig, play in dirt, drive toy cars, collect rocks and sticks, and do all of the other stereotypical things boys like to do.

But you know what else he likes? Nail polish, unicorns, bows, pink things, dress up items, the movie Frozen, Owlet, and being a dad to a collection of 15 animals, 4 blankets, and a partridge in a pair tree. He is spirited, spunky, and so much more than words can possibly describe but best of all, he's ours.

Silas has always loved things that are pretty, that sparkle, are bright and cheery, and we've always encouraged him to seek and play with whatever makes him happy. We've never discouraged him from wearing the Elsa costume because "it's for girls." We've never told him that he can't have his nails painted when I'm painting mine or his sister's. We've never told him he can't wear pink or a bow in his hair because he's not a girl. We've just allowed him to do what makes him happy.

Do I worry that one day he'll come up and tell me he's gay because I let him wear a dress?? Nope, not at all.

Do I think that he's confused about what it means to be a boy because I paint his nails when he asks? Also, no.

Am I afraid that he's not going to be "masculine enough" because he adores his pink elephant and unicorn lovies?Nada.

I worry about him falling down, or becoming  ill, or failing him as a mom- but I do not worry about him being "boy enough" or playing with things that "are for girls."

I love my son. No matter who he turns out to be. No matter who he grows up to love, as long he as loved back, immensely. No matter what colors or fabrics he chooses to wear. I love him in the here and now, and what makes him happy is bright pink elephants.

Bargain Beachwear 🐊🌞

On our relocation (I mean vacation😉) Salad asked to visit the Alligator store off the island. Who can resist a store with a larger than life alligator sculpted on the front?! So of course we stopped!

I told each kiddo they could pick one thing to take home as a souvenir from the trip. My eldest picked out his 567th hoodie, and my two littles each picked out their 17th stuffed animal to carry around(😂). My little bean picked out several creatures but finally settled on a neon pink Narwhal, we're trying to convince her to name Norma. But my Salad sat there conflicted by the choice.

In his little hands were two beautiful bright pink creatures. In one hand a plump, round unicorn and in the other, a soft and floppy elephant. He hugged them both, he rubbed them on his face to see the softness, and he struggled to decide which one he needed because he needed both. Finally when I told him it was time to leave he ultimately chose the unicorn who he named Fuzzy. When we pulled out of the store, I thought about how hard he had worked to make a choice and felt a little sad that he had to leave the elephant, who he also loved, behind.

Daddy had a boo boo so Si decided to share Pinkie so he'd feel better.

But that's when Pop-O stepped in. Pop-O also saw the little guy struggle with who to bring home and when we weren't looking, he went back over to the animals and bought Silas this radiant little elephant, now named Pinkie.

Silas was so excited! And he still is today! Pinkie and Fuzzy are never very far from his reach.These creatures are soft and radiant just like our Si.

In our home colors are colors, clothes are clothes, and if you want pink things and glitter you can have them, or if you want to wear camo and roll around in the dirt that's fine too. Love is at the center of our home, not outdated stereotypes.

So what got me started on this thread? Why do I feel there's something to be said here??

Because as we were heading home from our vacation we decided we'd get a pizza to-go from our favorite little local pizza shop. Although we had just left the beach house, of course our little Sour Patch had to go potty! Since our car was packed to the brim, we couldn't find his shoes!! So in a pinch I grabbed his sister's pink hello Kitty shoes he had asked to wear a few days earlier, and sent him on his way with Dad to potty then pay for pizza while I waited in the car. No biggie, right??

Apparently it was a pretty big deal to an older man at the restaurant. He cut my four year old disapproving looks, dripping with judgement, and ignorance, all because of a pair of pink Crocs. My heart sank to see such a reaction, to see our happy go lucky little boy judged because he had on a pink pair of shoes...This man didn't know the frantic hunt for shoes that had taken place moments before, the last ditch effort to get something on his feet before he had an accident, or that my son adores those shoes either way. But who was he to judge?? I wonder what his inner speech sounded like? I wonder if he would've been less resentful if he had grown up allowed to explore his interests rather than forced in to stereotypical gender norms? I will never know.

But I do know that I am proud of my husband. My former military man, rough, tough, and macho who spoke up for our son. Who simply asked the man what it was he was staring at and continued walking towards our car, with our happy little boy in tow, pink shoes and all.

Some days I'm a "good mom," the one who makes Pinterest parfaits and sock bubble blowers, and other days I'm a total Momster. But day in and day out I am my kiddos biggest fan, his advocate, and his cheerleader. Whether he wants me to put him in a dress and have a tea party, or wants to run around and dig in the dirt, this Momster is there, loving, cherishing, and embracing the pink elephant in the room.💜